b Purely Gibberish: July 2011

Friday, July 29, 2011

I am so upset tonight. There was a boy I saw last Sunday in A&E came back again this evening with similar complaint but new symptoms. Turn out that his CVP line might be blocked/leaking causing the symptoms. I am upset because I have requested the snr reg to review him on Sunday; but casually being told to discharge this boy without seeing him since he is feeding ok and clinically well. I am upset because the line wasn't working since Friday last week and no one has the decency to report it. I am upset because the "fact that the line malfunction could be the reason for his symptoms" didn't cross my mind. I am upset because the consultant now see me as being in-capable of making the right decision by getting senior person to review a complicated case as this (although I did - TWICE!!). I am so upset that I cannot sleep tonight, I am coughing non stop since yesterday and I cannot stop thinking about the boy. I hope he would be okay.

Ughhhh, one of the dilemma of doing paeds is most of your patients can't give you any history!!!!


And I am really upset with this person who wouldn't take no as an answer. NO YOU CAN'T COME WITH ME TO LONDON!!!" N O

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Gila ah sampai dekat pukul 3 pagi berjaga mengusha blog kanak2 lepasan SPM yang bakal fly ke luar negara. Wei terasa tua gila. Riang gembiranya kanak2 itu mahu mengenal dunia. Tapi diorg lagi kenal dunia dari aku nampaknye. Dah bercouple bthn2, jelajah dunia sane sini, henglish berabuk mak datuk (ape kaitan). Anyway.....*ehem*ehem*

Kalau ikut perasaan aku tak percaya pun aku dah nak cecah 26 tahun usia. Tapi hakikatnye IC dan birth cert ku tidak menipu. Kad garda pun takleh tipu sebab same dengan passport ngan IC. Nampaknye aku aje yang menipu diri sendiri...

26 tahun? Bawak kereta pun tak tahu (ok esok kene pegi hantar cert theory test haritu), boyfriend tak pernah ade, rumah belum beli, simpanan belum cukup RM 10,000 RM 20,000 mahu melabur di ASB, jerawat tak hilang2 lagi macam budak remaja dengan hormon berterabur arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh tensen, lepas tu sume jururawat tanye aku dah ade anak ke stiap kali bergurau senda ngan kanak2 kat spital tu. SObs... muka macam mak budak dah ek :(

Eh tiba-tiba notice biceps ku sangat pejal, hmmmm ni mesti sebab selalu mengangkut kanak2 berusia 24 jam semasa baby check.

"the pic was good and d girl in it looked pretty"
And so u said. The fact u r still taken is indeed heartbreaking.

Monday, July 25, 2011

London Holidays BOOKED!!

Thursday, July 21, 2011


I can't help but to wonder. In the end are you happy now that you have chosen to be with her? Are you contented? Are you certain your heart would not go astray?

When you think back, it's just a matter of saying how you felt, deep in your heart. And we would've been together. I know you hate talking about the past. If it's a mistake you said just let the bygone be bygone. But would you live with your mistakes forever? I wonder if you are wondering too.

Monday, July 18, 2011

I am just so comfortable with how things are going these days. Having short coffee breaks together. Occasional road trips accross the country or just somewhere near. Few text messages when we're bored. Exchanging gossips and latest news. Each moment is precious, each second is a treasure. Every now and then I cant help myself but to wish we arent just friends. We get along so well; I wish there are more to these than just a daily hellos and goodbyes.

I could picture myself waking up every morning to see the same face over and over again. Saying things like "good day to u dear" or "I hope u have a great day at work!", " I miss you" or even something as cheesy as "Dear, I truly deeply love you". I would not regret anything I dont think, no. I dont even think it will ever cross my mind!

Wishful thinking Farah. As always, it gets you nowhere. Only a place where your heart is shattered when you realized he is going to be another one that gets away.

I know that place too well.

Monday, July 11, 2011

Day one SHO. Paeds SHO to be exact. Nervoussssss :s

Kids be nice to me please.