b Purely Gibberish

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Issues + problems = headache


Upon writing this, I've been-a few times, wrote an entry for today and deliberately deleting them-feeling 'off'ish and not right about every single one of them. There are too much issues processing happening in my central nervous system right now- of which I wish I could delete some- so that I would not be feeling the way I am now. Messy. I'm messy.

1st Issue:
When you can't do anything else but to think back about some particular scene that had happened to you with certain someone, are you in a process of developing some feelings towards that person? Unwanted feelings that should not be there in the firstplace because that person is "IN A RELATIONSHIP". Then, should I just ignore that so called 'feelings' because it would not mean anything at the end? The ignoring part is not as easy as I thought as this issue kept hunting me every single minute of the day. End of 1st issue.

2nd Issue:
Have you ever been in a situation when you are unconciously and slowly being shoved out of a conversation and when you realized about it, it's too late, you are completely alone and the other person is happily chating with some third party, ignoring you plus you don't even know what they are talking about? Well I did, a few times get caught in that kind of situation. Well, you can blame my PMS for being too sensitive but I can't just pretend to be happy all the time can I? End of 2nd issue.

3rd Issue:
I am feeling guilty for being such a hypocrite towards someone. Plus, I believe that I live in an anti-'hypocrite'sme scheme. This issue can be very unhealthy for my psychological development and I could end up hating myself for life. But to change my attitude or even saying that 'I am sorry' is not as easy as I thought it would especially when that someone hasn't change his/her attitude that made me a hypocrite towards him/her in the first place. End of 3rd issue.

4th Issue:
Though I can be a very sensitive person, I am only aware about certain issue when it has something to do with me or it would affect me, one way or another. Me with capital M and E. When certain issue befall upon someone- and it is a very big issue for him/her- I, putting capital ME in the head, would most probably not even realize that he/she is struggling to face that issue. If you need any help, just tell me....if you think I can help that is, or else don't bother. Warning: You might regret it - seeking help from me, as I could add up to the existing burden on your shoulder. Don't say I didn't warn you. End of 4th issue.

Note: above photo is Adam's or Esther's (i'm not sure which) from the Kinabalu peak. Nice eh!

3 Comments:

Blogger min said...

that 1st issue sound familiar ehehhe :D do u think i know that person???bcos i do think i know :D

1:46 PM  
Blogger fAraHnaDiaH said...

the word "stress" is written on my forehead kot

9:22 PM  
Blogger fAraHnaDiaH said...

alamak najmi, whom u think associated with the first issue tu is not the right person....guess again.. =p

9:06 PM  

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