What Do You Think?
My mind is currently being triggered by this one particular issue surrounding US - the so called "most reliable children of the '85/'84 in Galway"; the "hopes of Galway societies" to set the utmost examples for younger generations to follow. The FOURTH MEDS.
The event of which manage to provoke this commotion was a Barbecue session in a believed to be "remote+ secret + not easily accessible" location. (the inappropriate usage of words to describe the venue where the barbecue was held reflects the writer's own assumption of what perhaps could be other people's perception of the actual truth, of which could be part of the reason why they are against it in the first place).
I've been reading few versions of my friends' blog entries addressing the issues, how they personally think about it and its affect on their lives. We even had a few gatherings to discuss the relevance of the points put forward by some of those who were against it.
Issues that had arise from the gatherings were as such:
1) Venue - maybe it was a little bit too small to gather such an enormous crowds of ~30? The end verdict was that everyone agreed that this issue could be tackled more adequately in the future i.e. change of venue for the next barbecue/whatever session that involve both genders.
2) Immaturity - We are bunch of immature people for organizing the event? (Or what?) Is there any other point related to this comment? I simply could not find any connection between those two. Inevitably, some took this point seriously/personally partly because of their current position in a respected Malaysian society in Galway. Some just think this as an immature accusation on its own and decided that nothing should be done/change, full stop.
3)The main issue - Friendship and Socializing; where would you set the boundaries of communications between males and females?
Well, I think this is the main concern of all. Forth meds are also known as a "super- bubbly- and- friendly" bunch. And I am proud to be part it. So the issue is - are we being dangerously(against Islamic teaching) super-friendly? Believe me, I am consciously thinking about it too -weighing my actions and perceptions. How should I behave towards the opposite sex? I want to be a good Muslimah first, then the rest of good qualities will follow, inshaAllah (e.g. good daughter, student, friend etc.).
Yes, I am guilty of being too friendly sometimes. I joke around with anyone and almost everyone. Some people may perceive it as inappropriate, I simply put it as 'breaking the ice'. Drawing a definite line between what is appropriate and not in communications are tough matters. Being medical students where communication is an important tool - e.g. teamwork requires good communication, being a good doctor requires good communication to convey your message etc. - is harder.
I don't want to be known as dull, remote, unapproachable and unfriendly esp. now when all people are looking hard on Muslims- I am indeed a small ambassador to convey the message of Islam. Everything that I do, matters. Having said that, the appropriateness of communication between different gender is still an important issue to be dealt with. I am not suggesting that every communication (even when it is inappropriate) in the name of duty should be accepted. But as Amira had pointed out numerous times, "whatever you do don't be a hypocrite". We can learn, we can change our ways inshaAllah, but acting up/ faking up just to please certain people will not bring any good to anyone. Try to find balance? Would that be the appropriate solution?
4) During the gathering someone put this question forward, "Why do you want to have the barbecue held in the first place?" followed by a few more sentences that I believe specifically delivered to make us think about our own personal "niyat" or intention towards the event, I was stunned and personally hurt. Must it be that we all have bad intentions because we held such occasion? Maybe that person didn't mean to be disrespectful, but careful selection of words maybe could result in better outcome.
Side note: If you are trying to change something that is perceived as "Social norm", maybe you should think about other people's background and way of thinking. There are ways to persuade people and delivering harsh words isn't one of them. Please choose your words carefully. You want people to consider and possibly accept you point of view, not making them running away to the opposite direction.
Mistakes happen so that lessons could be learnt.
But have I learn anything from all of these? I am still far away from being an Ideal Muslimah I guess, but each step I take is towards becoming one, InshaAllah.
My mind is currently being triggered by this one particular issue surrounding US - the so called "most reliable children of the '85/'84 in Galway"; the "hopes of Galway societies" to set the utmost examples for younger generations to follow. The FOURTH MEDS.
The event of which manage to provoke this commotion was a Barbecue session in a believed to be "remote+ secret + not easily accessible" location. (the inappropriate usage of words to describe the venue where the barbecue was held reflects the writer's own assumption of what perhaps could be other people's perception of the actual truth, of which could be part of the reason why they are against it in the first place).
I've been reading few versions of my friends' blog entries addressing the issues, how they personally think about it and its affect on their lives. We even had a few gatherings to discuss the relevance of the points put forward by some of those who were against it.
Issues that had arise from the gatherings were as such:
1) Venue - maybe it was a little bit too small to gather such an enormous crowds of ~30? The end verdict was that everyone agreed that this issue could be tackled more adequately in the future i.e. change of venue for the next barbecue/whatever session that involve both genders.
2) Immaturity - We are bunch of immature people for organizing the event? (Or what?) Is there any other point related to this comment? I simply could not find any connection between those two. Inevitably, some took this point seriously/personally partly because of their current position in a respected Malaysian society in Galway. Some just think this as an immature accusation on its own and decided that nothing should be done/change, full stop.
In fairness do you think that it's appropriate to summarize our maturity status based on this single event?
3)The main issue - Friendship and Socializing; where would you set the boundaries of communications between males and females?
Well, I think this is the main concern of all. Forth meds are also known as a "super- bubbly- and- friendly" bunch. And I am proud to be part it. So the issue is - are we being dangerously(against Islamic teaching) super-friendly? Believe me, I am consciously thinking about it too -weighing my actions and perceptions. How should I behave towards the opposite sex? I want to be a good Muslimah first, then the rest of good qualities will follow, inshaAllah (e.g. good daughter, student, friend etc.).
Yes, I am guilty of being too friendly sometimes. I joke around with anyone and almost everyone. Some people may perceive it as inappropriate, I simply put it as 'breaking the ice'. Drawing a definite line between what is appropriate and not in communications are tough matters. Being medical students where communication is an important tool - e.g. teamwork requires good communication, being a good doctor requires good communication to convey your message etc. - is harder.
Quoting Dr. Dermotts lecture today, "Communication is very important especially when you try to educate the public. I once had a worried mother who walked out of my office because she thought I was comparing her child with animals" - Social and Preventive Medicine, "herd Immunity and Immunization"
I don't want to be known as dull, remote, unapproachable and unfriendly esp. now when all people are looking hard on Muslims- I am indeed a small ambassador to convey the message of Islam. Everything that I do, matters. Having said that, the appropriateness of communication between different gender is still an important issue to be dealt with. I am not suggesting that every communication (even when it is inappropriate) in the name of duty should be accepted. But as Amira had pointed out numerous times, "whatever you do don't be a hypocrite". We can learn, we can change our ways inshaAllah, but acting up/ faking up just to please certain people will not bring any good to anyone. Try to find balance? Would that be the appropriate solution?
4) During the gathering someone put this question forward, "Why do you want to have the barbecue held in the first place?" followed by a few more sentences that I believe specifically delivered to make us think about our own personal "niyat" or intention towards the event, I was stunned and personally hurt. Must it be that we all have bad intentions because we held such occasion? Maybe that person didn't mean to be disrespectful, but careful selection of words maybe could result in better outcome.
Side note: If you are trying to change something that is perceived as "Social norm", maybe you should think about other people's background and way of thinking. There are ways to persuade people and delivering harsh words isn't one of them. Please choose your words carefully. You want people to consider and possibly accept you point of view, not making them running away to the opposite direction.
Mistakes happen so that lessons could be learnt.
But have I learn anything from all of these? I am still far away from being an Ideal Muslimah I guess, but each step I take is towards becoming one, InshaAllah.
1:6 اهدِنَــــا الصِّرَاطَ المُستَقِيمَ
- Ihdinā ṣ-ṣirāṭ al mustaqīm
- Guide us to the straight path;
1:7 صِرَاطَ الَّذِينَ أَنعَمتَ عَلَيهِمْ غَيرِ المَغضُوبِ عَلَيهِمْ وَلاَ الضَّالِّين
- Ṣirāṭ al-laḏīna an'amta 'alayhim ġayril maġḍūbi 'alayhim walāḍ ḍāllīn
- The path of those whom you have blessed, not of those who have deserved anger, nor of those who stray.
posted by fAraHnaDiaH at
10:52 PM
1 Comments:
sama samalah kite mematangkan diri ini~! hahaa
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